


Always Been You

by crescent_gaia



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Captivity, M/M, Trust Kink maybe, memory retrieval
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-07-22 02:05:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7415044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crescent_gaia/pseuds/crescent_gaia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's always been Steve for Bucky and he needed some memories back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Always Been You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [heeroluva](https://archiveofourown.org/users/heeroluva/gifts).



> Please enjoy!

Steve took a deep breath, careful not to move, if only because it hurt too much. He wasn’t sure what day it was or how long he had been in the small room, only how he got there. It was a hard blow to the back of the head, from a metal arm, and that was the only reason he didn’t try to leave when he could. He stayed for Bucky, at least that’s how he rationalized it, instead of seeing himself as some sort of captive. He wouldn’t mind that either, as it wasn’t too bad – he was fed, there was a bathroom – but the reason his body hurt was due to all the sex.

Bucky was remembering, bit by bit, but only after he came into the room and had his way with Steve. Usually with Steve on his stomach or pressed chest first into a wall but never face to face with each other. Steve didn’t press it, not wanting to upset his friend too much, and it felt a lot like the sex they had before. When they were first together, Steve was the one who didn’t want to be seen. Now it was the other way around, with Steve trying not to jump from the coldness of the metal arm, even though it would warm up after a while. 

Which is how it got to now, with Steve on his stomach and Bucky resting in him. Steve didn’t tense at the gentle kiss to the back of his neck. “Buck?” he asked quietly.

“Been trying to piece something together for a while,” Bucky replied quietly. “But now I remember it.”

Steve kept his breathing even. If Bucky was done using him, he was afraid that his friend – well, really, his lover – would just up and disappear again. He couldn’t take it this time but he also couldn’t push. If only because he wanted the answer. “What was it?”

“Us, together, on the morning before the train,” Bucky said quietly. “Even with all they did, it kept on coming back up to the surface. Over and over again… it was the one part of my life that they couldn’t kill. They ripped it to shreds, like everything else, but the two of us, laying there and content… they couldn’t ever get it away. It’s why I was put back in the chair time and time again. They kept on trying to take it away.”

Steve smiled. “We had a lot more times than that.”

“I know.” Bucky chuckled. “They’re not all sexual. It’s just the sex helps to bring them back. So does killing, but I don’t want to do that anymore. Not for anyone.”

“You don’t have to. But is this why you brought me here? We could have… it didn’t have to be in this small room, Buck.”

“You’ve got others now and… I just have you, Steve. It’s always just been you,” Bucky whispered, pulling out and turning away, starting to clean up.

“They’re friends. They’re not like what you are to me, Bucky. Never.”

“Not even – “

“No, not even Stark. It was never Stark in the end, either of them, and the sooner people start realizing that, the better. You included. You’re more than enough for me, Bucky Barnes, but I don’t think you trust me.”

“I don’t trust myself,” Bucky said, turning and tilting his head at Steve still laying there. “You can get up.”

“I wasn’t sure if you want me to,” Steve said, slowly getting up. He winced, a small bit, and Bucky was at his side to help him. “I’m okay. I’ll heal.”

“You should say something when I go too far.” Bucky looked Steve over with a worried eye before helping him into the bathroom. He got the shower running, making sure Steve went in there first before he followed. He used his good hand, his only hand, to massage out some of the tension before taking the soap and washcloth to clean Steve. When he started to clean around Steve’s balls, he noticed his captain was hard. “Didn’t you…?”

“Not this time. And not because of you. You’re not the only one with memories that spark each time we’re together.”

“And what do you remember?” Bucky asked, starting to slowly stroke the washcloth down Steve’s cock.

“One time, before you were going to leave for the war, you wanted to try a rope trick. It stretched my arms tight behind me but I loved the feeling of it. You were worried that my arms were going to break, but they didn’t. It was one of our last nights together, going until midnight, when we decided to take a break. My arms hurt like hell for going so long that, when you untied me, I came from the pain and feeling of being free.”

Bucky stroked him harder for his answer, squeezing as he came back to the base, and it didn’t take long for Steve to come soon after that. “We should try doing that again sometime,” he whispered in Steve’s ear before kissing the middle of his captain’s neck. “Although, you could probably break the rope now if you wanted to.”

“I wouldn’t. I trust you. I trust that you won’t hurt me, unless you’re not yourself, and even then, there’s a reason. There’s always going to be a reason.”

Bucky sighed and made sure that Steve rinsed off before the two of them left the shower. Steve toweled himself off, keeping an eye on Bucky out of the corner of his eye, but the soldier didn’t notice. He was too much in his head on how he could have so much control over one person, one person who would trust him over anything, and it was getting to be too much. He jumped when Steve put a hand on his shoulder but nodded. “We should probably go.”

“Go where?” Steve asked. “I’m not even sure where we are.”

“Home,” Bucky said. He went out of the bathroom and grabbed two backpacks.

“Why?” Steve asked, taking one of them and getting out the clothing to put on.

“Because I trust you too,” Bucky said before grabbing him and pulling him into a long kiss. “If you don’t mind the metal arm.”

“I don’t, as long as you warm it up first. And yes, we can discuss using it when we’re back,” Steve said, kissing Bucky on the cheek. The two dressed and headed for New York, hand in hand, each feeling better with the person they love by their side.

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, um, while there was some sex, please don't hate me for not having more. :)


End file.
